Initial Thoughts

[This blog will serve as my process journal for T440, "The Having of Wonderful Ideas" with Professor Eleanor Duckworth]

I look forward to surrendering myself to this class; I am pretty sure it will be the most challenging academic experience I have ever had insofar as it is is completely different for every other class I have taken, including art classes. The point is not right answers or end points or researching authorities. The point is to have wonderful ideas.

Before coming to HGSE, I read essays from The Having of Wonderful Ideas and was blown away. I had studied with Freirians before, but never ones who adopted the approach in their own teacher training, nor those who extended the methods beyond the arts and informal learning environments, into the academic classroom. I was thrilled to have the opportunity to study with such a person. When I arrived, however, and began looking through the course catalog at all the offering I began to question the validity of taking HWI as one of my precious few options. Wouldn't I learn more in a class that was more traditional? I realized that in spite of my initial impressions of Dr. Duckworth's approaches and analyses, I--an artist an arts educator--was stuck in a mindset of standards and tests as the ultimate measures of learning. My learning experiences growing up were so competitive and grade-based that my own judgement was trumped by my ingrained values.

"Going to the Movies" was wonderful. Like many in the class, I remembered the formula to answer the question. Only when I later looked at the assignment did I realize that "that question" (how many there are) was not asked. I had heard what I expected to hear. As did the girl with whom I conducted the exercise this weekend. The tendency to answer a question with a rote formula is so pervasive, the impression that we are being tested even when all signs suggest that we are not, is so pervasive that it overpowers our inputs. Why would we be doing this exercise if not to come up with a correct answer? The formula fails us once again when we are asked how we can tell that we have them all and no repeats. My answer was "by looking," but I knew that I had 24. Pressed further, I said something like "well, everything takes a turn being in first place, then in second and then there are only 2 choices an the the next one goes in pace 2." My subject's answer was "because I did it methodically," but she also counted. When I showed her a repeat, it did not shake her much, because she knew the "answer."

I have high hopes for this class. Some are so personal and individual that no class could meet them. I hope that the class liberates me from the need to have the right answer. I hope the class encourages me to figure out things on my own, instead of relying on finding experts, even if other people are watching. This class is already challenging me to rethink the value and functions of my own thoughts on learner confidence, and I think that is the first step.